17 June 2005

Joyful things

Not in any particular order:

1. The gardenias are blooming. I have one bush which I tend all year, and in the space of a week it bears lots of beautiful, big, heavenly fragrant flowers. Ahhh.

My grandmother had three huge avocado trees in her front yard, ringed by gardenia bushes. The smell of gardenias in the house makes me think of home, and her. I would be glad if I could make my house a home like hers was.

2. The BIG earthquakes this week were offshore. The smaller ones were plenty, thank you very much, God. I've lived in Southern California all my life and, like so many long-time residents, I can tell how large an earthquake is, how far away the epicenter, etc. I will never forget the afternoon when the Loma Prieta quake hit. I was talking to a friend at work, sitting at my desk, she standing. "We are having an earthquake," I said. She doubted and disputed. The motion was very slight... swaying, long gentle rolls in a circular-feeling motion. "Oh dear," I said. "It's a big one - very big and far away." And then spent all night watching the news in horror. :(

3. I was really upset earlier today over something, and now, after reading all the interesting and funny and encouraging stuff you all have written, I feel better.

I was telling someone about my blog the other night, and she asked if mine was funny. Uh... nope, not yet. She was kind enough to say I'm witty; she's biased, I think. But it is true I have been indulging myself terribly here, and really need to get my head up out of the bilge of my past and find some new bilge to comment on.

The weird thing is, I feel this way because a connection which I've relied upon heavily for the last almost-three years seems to finally be coming apart. We needed each other then; we helped each other in so many ways that only we could. But now, it's got a feeling like... it's over. I dunno. We'll see. In the meantime, I'll water my gardenia bush and take care of myself and my house.

Finally, my doctor sent me a slip with the results of Tuesday's lab work. My cholesterol is 152 ("good!" she wrote in the margin). You know you're At An Age when things like that cheer you up. Heh.

Oh, here's a great motto I found in a post on The Mother's Hour: festina lente. It means, "make haste slowly." Now, That describes me!

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