26 November 2005

Grateful days

It is perhaps really sad to say so, but I had a wonderful Thanksgiving with my sister and her husband. It's sad because it was never fun with my in-laws; not awful, just not comfortable, on many levels. And my parents are both dead, which helps enormously. I'm sorry if that doesn't sound sufficiently devoted. I loved them dearly and missed them terribly. It's still easier now.

My sister and her husband are quite a bit younger than I. It's cute to see how they care for me, suggesting ideas for ways I could take better care of the house or myself. I feel very much like the tables are being turned. Even as it makes me feel my age, it comforts me to know that they truly care. I'm not only grateful for them, but for the healing which has allowed me to notice their care, and appreciate it.

Over the last few years I've had an emotional awakening. I'd spent many years shutting down my emotions, never letting my feelings show, or even be recognized. Now I'm almost too much the other way... but it helps me to know what's going on around me. I can be grateful for those who love me... I can recognize that they do.

When asked what I want for Christmas, I think of the blessings I've had in the past year, and think there's not much more that I need or want. There's not much left over from my paycheck at the end of the month, but God has blessed me with health and love, appetite and food to eat, the ability to sleep and wake refreshed, a place to walk in the fresh air, and meaningful work to do. I am grateful.

I hope you, too, have lots to be grateful for.


daisymarie said...

When I start think about all that I'm grateful for, I start to feel like John writing about Jesus: there's so much more than all the books could hold.

Thanks for sharing your blessings.

HeyJules said...

Daisymarie, that's a beautiful thought.

You do have a lot to be grateful for - look how far you've come this year in facing your personal demons and working through the things that can hold you back in life. It can be hard being on the emotional end of the stick but it can be one of life's biggest blessings, also. It always reminds me of the morning that Ebenezer Scrooge woke up after being visited by the ghosts. Life was fresh and new and he couldn't wait to be a part of it!